19 October, 2010
God never sleeps, he always listen.
Dont try to mould God's standard into your mindset. Mould your mindset to God's standards.
Amazed how little things matter and not always the big things in life. Am i willing to be the one to do all the small things and if i am not recognize by people, or even people take credit, would i still do. I am very encouraged by Andrew, the bible character where he recognized God' sovereignty in his life and he knows God is real and he knows the urgency to share about God's to people where he shared to his brother immediately when he saw Jesus.
Andrew never belittle the small roles he did like he believes that the 2fishes and 5 loaves can feed 5000 people.
Haha, i felt that God is training me to be like that. In Melbourne, where i am alone with Him, not much people around me unlike in Singapore. I see my heart really humble towards God. During this period of time, you let me see more and more of my weakness which i never really pay attention. You dont condemn me but never me realized the need to depend on you more and more. Lord, help me to see my breakthrough in sharing about You, about my stronghold, about be holy in You, in my prayer life.
God, you really love me: You showed me 3 nice rainbows in different situations! starry sky, Sun rays etc! I am proud of what you showed me! I believed not many people able to see what i see..
Most importantly, u use me through my facebook! having someone to be encouraged by my faith and asked me to pray for him! You used me to ask him to go back to you!
So many things to thank you!
Lord, please help me now to concentrate to do my project! wahaha
21 July, 2010
Was rather upset with my uncle! He made me cried. Uncle and aunty said that i am not mature, need to grow up. Yea, i cant deny that i need to grow up. However, if everyday people say to you almost everyday, how do you feel? I felt that they dont trust me, if they nag at me almost daily, how to have room to grow. Now i understood the feeling of giving people space to grow and trust them. We are to nuture people and not to control them. I realized that i made this mistake of controlling people and not nuture them in the past. Thank God that you forgave me.
Wow, when come to me forgiving people, i just think of the hurts i have from them. Sure, its easy to dislike people and hate them. Have to be careful in our thoughts, if not hatred,dislike, things negative can come in. Well, candace reminded me that when you dislike someone means you dont not love God enough. But i do love God, well i have not go deep enough to his love. I will keep trying to grow, to obey. But i am not going to use my own effort only. God, I am coming to you vulnerable- with a need and a honest heart- I am rebellious etc, uncle and aunty disliked my attitude.. God help me! pls!
For now, i am going to forgive my uncle and aunty. Through these, i realized that communciation is super important. sometimes, seriously i found my intentions, thoughts and comments good. But, the tone to deliver was bad and it leads to anger, miscommunication, mistrust etc.
God, in my mist of trying, let me not be tired in doing good and to give up. I am going to perserve so that my faith will increase and the growth of my character. But God, please dont test beyond my limit. Through my weakness, it proves my reliance to God but this doesnt demerit who i am. I am a wonderful creation of God.
There's one prayer that i learnt that i need to make everyday- God, i know that it is the truth that I am wonderfully and fearfully made by you and you love me deeply. There is nothing else to make you love me more or less. Lord, let me not know this truth, but understand it and internalize it into my heart and let all the lies telling me that i am not good enough to flee in your name, Jesus Christ!! Lord, i am being pursue by you daily and i am a princess. :)
12 July, 2010
Pic with mum and bro with my web cam!
One day after my bro and mum went back home to Spore after 2 weeks in Melbourne. They are great support to me in adapting my life here in Melbourne. Initally when they came, i wasnt happy as i wanted full independent life in Melbourne here. I was wrong about myself being adapt well independently. God just know me well thus he got my mum and bro to accompany here. Love them and treasure them. Was abit rebellious to my mum but i knew she loved me lots though sometimes she dont show. She saved alot thus i am able to be in Melbourne. I want to be a filal child where i study well and improve my attitude to show my mum and dad. Well, this can only be done with God! I told God umpteem times that i need the holy spirit to help me..
I am so convinced that i am in Melbourne to grow my relationship deep with God. In 2 the 1: 11- With this in mind, we constantly pray for you that our God may count you worthy of his calling and that by his power he may fulfill every gd purpose of yours and every act prompted by yr faith. Amen for that verse, God is the ultimate one with great authority. I want to be worthy of his calling in terms of i want to be more like Jesus. convinced that by this verse, that why i want to be mature in God, then he can fulfill his will in him and then in v12- We pray this so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ. Yes, God to glorify in my life. Not based on myself but with God's grace.
Another reason why i am sure God wants be to grow in relationship in Him is because i read the book captivating. God prompted me in the heart to grow my romance with Him and to understand my make up as a woman and to really be secure in Him and not look for romance, care about how ppl look @ me. I am who i am..
27 June, 2010
In melbourne right now!
Now is 9.53 melbourne time, it is still so early.. So carefree here till i feel bored somehow. somehow i miss spore! Have to keep my heart, mind, spirit in line with God's word and pray more and more.
I am thankful that God speaks to me here and there when i am in mel. Firstly: He remind me of his convenant with me with a very very very beautiful rainbow! secondly: He kinda of know i am fearful of communicating with austrailian and my uncle. So he reminded me to fear him only and that whatever i do, i should please Him and that is enough!! He also remind me about my identity in Him. Situations just prune my character but not determine my character.. Amen.
Now listening to the song- Oceans will part- so reminded aout God's plan in my life and i miss service!
Thirdly: My auntie and uncle loved me deeply, they celebrated my bro and mine's belated bdae. Its just a simple bdae cake and bdae sond. but it is the heart that is so loving.
Fourthly: I learned about servanthood spirit from my uncle's neighbor. This spirit is to love ppl with his all. He is such a humble man and he never says no to ppl. I pray that he says yes to jesus one day. I saw that friendship evangelize is gd in melbourne here. I shall adopt that and they can see my life..
Fifth: Blessed with shopping.
God, i lift up my stay in melbourne to you! In yours hand. You are my all.
God, i was aliitle upset about the ess, dont understand why nexus didnt flood and rp didnt hit 42.. we trusted u le and we prayed. God pls speak to me about. o rlly wana know why..
02 June, 2010
I felt that since 25th of May to lst of June- I experienced God's power tangibility and he anwered many of my questions.
It been awhile that you touched me tangibility, indeed i seek u, i will find you. You are indeed faithful.
It been a long time when i was negative and i kept crying to God.
One hard truth i learnt before i stopped being negative was that I am really a child of God where no one can fight and snatch the position of mine unless i deny it. The past failures, the past of being judge by people, of insecurities, of not allowing people to speak into my life are all sarcificed under the blood of Jesus. I am really really really made new.
I am burden for people who yet to be set free.
THIS POST TO BE CONTINUED
25 May, 2010
Learnt a new word from jolene- Renunication is repositioning my heart for God, throwing away earthly things for God!
26 days in Singapore.. Help me to reposition my heart and strategies the way u want it, God.
20 May, 2010
This whole week are questions about identity in God, priority questions, value questions.
Sometimes you just need to be utterly honest with yourself, not trying to defend yourself. It seems to make sense why i am doing what i am doing.
With all I am:
Into your hands, I commit again.
With all I am, For you lord,
you hold my world in the palm of your hands
And i am yours forever
Jesus, i believe in you, jesus i belong to you
The reason that i live, the reason that i sing with all i am
I walk with you forever you go, through tears and joy, i trust in you
I believe in all of your ways, your promises forever
Jesus, i believe in you, Jesus i belong to you
The reason that i live, the reason that i sing, with all I am
I will worship you (7x)
This song lyrics is just sing of my heart.
As i was listening through my prexmas testimony on how God has changed my life- I am amazed by you, Jesus. All the testmonies that i have testified is really all about you. No one including myself can draw yr credit away. Praise you Jesus! Who on this earth will come and pick me up and say u love me.
Who will teach to turn my wrong ways to the right ways to live my life. My life that focus in showing the strong side of me when i am not, in trying to survive in this competitive jungle. My ways of proving self esteem all redundant when you simply love me.
Have i forget the lst love in you? Why when you really love me, I still complain. Jesus, I want the full life that you have exchanged your blood for me. I am holy discontented!
The truth- we have eyes to see, ears to hear, but we fail to do. The fact is God has offer so much opportunities for us! Live at the Karos moment, lead by the spirit of God. Spirit birth spirit. Another truth, we mayknow the truth but notheart of commander. Bring me deep to know you, when i know you, it is easy to live a maximise life. God, let me know you beyond the pages of bible. Let me know you! Thats me. Father, look at my heart.
Bring me (Action) deep, Jesus. That my heartfelt prayer. Amen
